Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
Randomize
