is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
