I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
