the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
