I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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