Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
Me too!
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize