Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
"Where are you? Where are my keys? What is this guys name again? Why am I wearing two pairs of your pants?"
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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