You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I just want to make out with him forever
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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