What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
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