Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
