i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
false alarm. still invincible.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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