hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
soo... how was my night?
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