walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Randomize