I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
