it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
