She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
Sign she's a keeper: "I would rather be late to brunch than waste a perfectly good boner."
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
Randomize
