Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
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