I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
