is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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