so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
i am positive it's ok to drink. it's just pieces of the plastic knife i forgot was in the blender.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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