i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
