guys are not supposed to queef...right?
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Randomize
