i'm chasing tequila w mint flavored ice cream, phil's chasing it w cream cheese, bashar's chasing it w pickles...i think we all know who the winner is....
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
