i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Randomize
