Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize
