I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
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