You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
Randomize
