have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Randomize
