Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
Randomize
