Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize