I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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