Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
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