Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
