He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize