i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize
