my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
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