Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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