oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
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