You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
Randomize
