Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
