You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
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