drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
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