i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Totally just asked Dad if I needed to show the real estate guy my tits so he would let us buy the house. I've really got to work on that filtering thing.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
