i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
