More tranny stories later!
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
Randomize
