i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Randomize
