I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He shit in the fireplace
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
