My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
Randomize
