sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
