as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
Randomize
